This was originally published in the December 2, 2022, edition of the Ebulletin: 

Content warning: Though the words “ally” and “allyship” are meant to have a positive position in everyone’s vocabulary, talking about it, reading about it, and practicing it are all separate beasts. Once it is mastered it’s amazing, but until then it can be uncomfortable. If you aren’t ready to be uncomfortable, then maybe this read isn’t for you, and that’s okay. If it is - let’s get into it.

Allyship by definition:

1. The status or role of a person who advocates and actively works for the inclusion of a marginalized or politicized group in all areas of society, not as a member of that group, but in solidarity with its struggle and point of view and under its leadership.
2. The relationship or status of persons, groups, or nations associating and cooperating with one another for a common cause or purpose.

Allyship is the real work and sacrifices you must put in so that marginalized communities can feel like they’re welcomed to the table that has traditionally left them out. To ensure they have space to speak their truths and not be dismissed, rejected, or ostracized from their work community. There are real world consequences when your words and commitment to being an ally don’t match your actions. The choice to be performative to fit in or look good to others, instead of being actionable, is detrimental not only to the marginalized people who placed their trust in you, but to your workplace, real-world situations, others in that marginalized community, movements you march in each year to show support, to your families, friends and to yourself…the ally.

Being an ally is challenging: once you see, hear, and know injustice, you can’t unsee, unhear, or unknow it. It can lead to anger. Disappointment. Heartache. You might be questioned where your loyalty lies. It can feel very lonely. If you feel like you didn’t sign up for this, remember that your family, friends, and co-workers who belong to marginalized communities didn’t either, and they don’t have a choice. The very people you are trying to stand up for may react with frustration and anger themselves, given the conflict and pain that inform their daily existence.

Being an ally can also be amazing: allyship pushes back against toxic behaviours that plague every single community across the globe. Allyship gives men, women, children, BIPOC folks, people on the spectrum, people with physical disabilities, LGBTQ+ communities, and others the chance to thrive. Allyship opens the door for the chance to participate in other people’s communities. Genuine allyship changes expectations, elevating people around us to do better, giving us all the opportunity to be the change we want to see in our workplaces.

If you choose to dive into allyship to be a part of the solution, these are the some of the pillars to being a better ally:

1. Educate yourself. Read a book, watch educational material, take a class. Stop relying on the marginalized people in your life to do the homework for you. They live it every day. It’s not appropriate to make them relive the trauma they’ve experienced to teach you.
2. Listen to constructive criticism. When someone calls you out for your behaviour, it’s not a personal attack. They are giving you the gift of unlearning what our society has taught you.
3. Learn from your mistakes. To grow we must make mistakes. Without mistakes and the growth that comes with acknowledging and improving our behavior, we will not change.
4. Don’t tone police. If your biggest concern is the way marginalized communities call attention to injustice, you may want to recalibrate your priorities. Marginalized communities are not obligated to ask for equality in a way that feels comfortable to you.
5. Stay aware. Be mindful of your behaviour, your inner circle’s behaviour, your coworkers’ behaviour. And be aware of our greater society – the choices politicians make may not affect you directly, but could have critical impact on the people you have pledged to be shoulder to shoulder with.
6. If someone calls on you for expertise in this area, make space for someone from the marginalized community to speak instead.
7. And perhaps most importantly: genuine allyship does not earn you special recognition. There are no awards for confronting issues from a position of privilege when others have to live with these same issues every day.

Speak up and speak out when you know something is wrong. Our business is in “make believe” and has a huge audience around the globe. It also can have a profound impact in our society. Your everyday choices can cause a chain reaction – leading to more diverse stories being told, and to increasing understanding and acceptance of marginalized and stigmatized communities everywhere. Creating space for more positions at the top to include a vast network of diverse people promotes diversity and inclusion beyond our workplaces, into society at large. The more we stand up for those who are marginalized, the more we reduce the negative impacts that cause harm.

The DGC BC is running a Bystander Intervention course on December 3. If you didn’t get the chance to register, we will be running it again. I hope you take the time to check it out. As this world continues to navigate a vast complicated uncertain future, I urge my fellow DGC Members to expand our knowledge and practices of allyship. Choose to be the change. Take a moment to check in with someone from a marginalized community to see how they are doing. That recognition goes a long way.

Graysen Sangster
DGC BC Diversity and Inclusion Committee Co-Chair